The server list here shows some useful information for picking a server:
http://www.eqemulator.org/index.php?pageid=serverlist
That will show you which servers have how many players on them at any given time. Also, if you click the view link for a server, most of them give some details on the server and/or a website link where you can go to read more about the server.
There are 1 or 2 servers out there made specifically for solo play, but many of them are solo friendly at least until you reach higher end content where you may want to either start multi-boxing multiple characters to play with yourself, or you may want to make friends and/or join a guild to take on the harder content.
For someone first getting into EQ, I would recommend you try one of the custom servers. The live-like servers are cool too, but they are probably going to be much more slower paced than you may be used to if you have tried other MMORPGs. Really, I would recommend giving each of the Legend/Preferred servers a try for a while and see which you like best.