1. Find this in your eqemu_config.xml in your server folder:
Code:
<defaultstatus>20</defaultstatus>
Change '20' to '0'.
2. Starting_items is the table that you want to edit to change what items players start with.
3. I assume you could add a command entry for the command in the commands table.
4. I haven't looked at the different rulesets, as I only use ruleset 1.
I apologize for not being very helpful, I just thought I would answer what I could.