DR4's got some issues to be worked out, which is why you don't see that many servers running it. Only the ones that are willing to be guinea pigs for testing are going up to DR4 right now.
All I can suggest is give it some time. Eventually DR5 or whatever will fix these issues... assuming SOE doesn't come around then and screw around with the network code again.
If you have older files, you can play on DR3 servers. The May 5 version of eqgame.exe and May 6 version of eqmain.dll work on DR3 just fine.
(In case you're not aware, it's against the board rules to ask for the client files, so please don't. I'm just saying if you can get your hands on them from a guildmate or friend who either backed them up or maybe took a break so he hasn't patched since then.)
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