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Old 09-23-2005, 05:47 AM
thorndruid
Fire Beetle
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Posts: 11
Talking new EULA

IMPORTANT-READ CAREFULLY: By viewing these web pages, you ("the end-user") agree to abide by the following conditions. Violation is punishable by law.

1. You will not copy, modify, duplicate, print, transmit, download, interpret, redistribute, evaluate, be inspired by, filter, decode, or otherwise reproduce elements of these pages.

2. You agree to only keep one copy of these pages on your computer at any one time. Viewing these pages with multiple browsers, keeping a disk cache, making printouts with a browser window open, having two people view the same browser window simultaneously, and thinking about one part of these pages while viewing another are strictly prohibited.

3. You will follow a strict Kantian interpretation of these pages. Attempts to view these pages in an ironic or post-structuralist fashion are strictly prohibited.

4. Reviews of these pages and comments to other people must be made in strictly dulcet, admiring tones. For example, "eqemulator is the kindest, bravest, warmest, most wonderful conference I've ever known in my life."

5. You agree not view these pages on a Thursday.

6. Thou shalt honor thy father and thy mother.

7. No guarantees are made as to the correctness, accuracy, pertinence, usefulness, or quality of the material on this website. In fact, there are several out-and-out lies. See if you can figure out where they are. We think you'll be pleasantly surprised.

8. By viewing these pages, you agree that this EULA voids all preceding relevant laws and EULA's. You agree to waive your rights to sue eqemulator for any and all infringement. eqemulator will be viewed as strictly above the law, with all the equivalent rights (but not duties) of a sovereign nation-state.

9. This EULA will be considered binding even if you do not explicitly agree to it. This EULA will be considered binding even if you do not view these web pages.

10. The party of the first part shall be known in this EULA as the party of the first part. That's pretty neat, eh?

11. You are already in violation of this EULA. You will surrender all assets, possessions, and children upon demand. Come to the stone bridge by the misty river at midnight and await further instructions.
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