Are people Idiots?

and I was basically told I'd have to wait by most people (though no one mentioned that I could download the version checker, install my unpatched fresh copy off of my cds, run the checker, and then see if there's an older EQEmu version that would run with it).

I am glad nobody sayd that to you, because there is NO version of eqemu that will work with a fresh install.

The very first rule is:
Warez Is NOT Allowed
-This includes the transfer of any copyrighted material, including EQ Files and backpatches. Requesting files, even in a PM, will result in a ban.

notice the

including EQ Files

part?

also http://www.eqemulator.net/forums/showthread.php?t=19952 I flat out told you there.